Self help: Making decisions for youself

Hey everyone,

Welcome back! 

Today's post is about decision making. This is something I have a lot of experience with and it took me a long time to come out of my shell. I know it may sound silly, 'not knowing how to make the right decisions' but at the end of the day, speaking from personal experience, I found it very hard to change my perspective on it, especially if you're someone who is shy/timid or have been labelled by a lot of negative connotations. 

When you are in that state of mind, it is very difficult to snap out of it, cause your brain defaults whenever you face similar situation. In terms of making decisions, if you're someone that has not got the chance to choose & decide since young, it is completely normal to be where you are today which brings me to share with you ways to empower you to make more of your OWN decisions and be okay with it. 

1) Trust yourself. 

Yes, you've heard this line loads. Trusting someone is hard enough, but trusting yourself can be just as hard. It's about allowing yourself to acknowledge the good & bad side and to be able to encourage yourself when you need it most. It takes time and loads of trial & error but start small. Another thing I find helps is, to be less critical towards yourself. One exercise that can help you start the process is meditation. Whenever I meditate, I get to be at this state whereby you accept yourself for who you are and you are in total peace with your surroundings. It's truly calming and uplifting.

[I'm not affiliated with this , but I personally use Headspace and it works wonders].

2) Have courage to make decisions.

If you're like me, where you feel guilty over making the wrong decisions, then this is for you. The start is always rough, but you need to tell yourself that it's ok if you get it wrong. Making decisions comes with practice and slowly, you build confidence to decide & demand for what you want without feeling guilt. The main thing I found helped, was telling yourself to not rush into making decisions. It can feel stressful in that moment, when you're confronted but take a deep breath & go for what you want.

3) Pay attention to how your body reacts.

Let's go into something deeper. If making decisions makes you anxious,confused and lost, then paying attention to how your body reacts might help you get out of your comfort zone. By being aware of your emotions and reactions, it allow you to understand what is going on better. For example, if you start feeling confronted, pressured, exposed and guilt when it comes to making decisions, this is where you tell yourself - 'I know these emotions are normal, that's because I'm doing something new, it will be fine'. By being aware of your emotions, you are able to intercept and encourage yourself through those tough bits.

4) The more you make, the more comfortable you become.

Making decisions are part of our everyday life. I am sure you make them without even realizing it. It's an instinct that we all have. It's when you start to worry what people may think is when, problems arise. So the more decisions you make, the more confidence you have in yourself, the easier it becomes. Similar to speaking your opinion to a group of people, the more confident you are in yourself, the less doubt you have on your opinions. 

5) Reflect and Grow

Making decisions are going to be a constant thing to do as grow up. It's part of life and the more you do it, the easier it gets. It becomes one thing less to worry or think about. Don't be afraid to reflect on your past, reflect on your behaviors and reflect on what you could better. From there, use those information to help you grow and push yourself out of that shell. Remember its your progress, no one else's. Any effort you make into improving it, is progress. 

All in all, I can't tell you how to make decisions but I can encourage you to go with your gut instinct. 9/10 you already know the answer, it's about having the confidence to say it & take action. I am sure, everyone one of you who are finding this difficult will develop your own progress in your own way. Don't get me wrong, it is hard and I 100% understand how it sometimes may feel impossible to make choices without any guilt or regret but remember this, 

'We are humans, when we are faced with a roadblock, we don't just stand there. We turn, we adapt, we change routes and we create our own path towards our goal'. 

Being in our comfort zone feels great but it doesn't allow us to grow, and eventually we stop growing. This is why, we need to come out of our shell and get comfortable towards change.

I hope this post has enlighten you to push yourself to be a better version of yourself and to chase towards the person you want to be. 

Have a great day,
G.