Relationship - Friendship in your 30s

 Hi, welcome back! I wanted to reflect today on my friendships and now that I'm in my 30s, I'm noticing how things have changed, my friendships/relationships have changed, how my perspective or what I want from a friendship has changed. 

It's normal for friends to come and go as we progress further in our life. Our mindset and perspective changes as we grow older so accepting that people may come and go is normal. One thing I would say is that, it is hard making new friends as an adult and if you notice, a lot of people tend to stay within that same friendship group whether it's from an old work place, high school or university in their adult life. 

I remember, in uni or in school, making friends comes naturally because you're in a room full of people of the same life circumstances so it's easier to connect. However, as an adult. you have different group of friends such as work friends, university friends, childhood friends, mum friends (if you're a parent), etc. The good thing is that you get to have friends from all walks of life - different jobs, different stages of life, live in different cities/countries and different background. 

If you're willing to take the time to invest in these people, then yes it can work out but let's be real - 9/10, after work, the last thing you want to do is to communicate and share about how your life has been. I think it's important to have an open mind because you never know where you will meet new friends and don't be afraid to try would be my next advice.

Making friends as an adult means you're more likely to meet new people either through your job or hobbies or if you're a parent. For me, I'm not a parent yet so I meet new people through my work or my hobbies which is, gym or through mutual friends. 

The way we meet new people may be more difficult now that we're adults but if you don't try, you never know. It's also finding the right person to make your wavelength/interest. Not everyone you come across will click with you and that's ok. There's no need to take it personally or to try and keep them in your life. As an adult, most friendships now starts from networking. Adjusting your expectations helps to prevent disappointment because from networking.

I think the last thing I would say is that, ask yourself this: do you actually want more friends or is it due to society that's pressuring you to have more friends? We're often influenced with what's around us and social media has been a BIG contributor to this. We see all the fantastic pictures and videos of people hanging out with their friends regularly and yes, it makes you feel lonely or missed out but it's important to reflect on what you want your social life to be. 

If you enjoy your time alone, if you have things to do at home, if you like being cozy, enjoy the peace and quiet then having a busy social life does not fit into that. So don't let others influence how you want your life to be. That would be my biggest learn about friendships in my 30s. 

PS - Tbh everyone dies alone anyways so don't be scared/afraid to be on your own. :P You have the freedom to do what you like so if you decide who you want to have in your life and who you don't = enjoy your 30s.   

Have a wonderful day and I hope that this post has helped you in some way,

G.